three things in human life are important:

the first is to be kind;

the second is to be kind;

and the third is to be kind.

henry james (1843 - 1916)

the sad part is that i learned of this quote thru csi...

i swear to jeebus i be livin in the dark...
damn...

r.i.p. russell jones

ol dirty bastard, aka russell jones, member of wu-tang clan cashes his chips in one day before his birthday...
he was kinda the odd man out, the monkey of the group...
literally jumpin around like one...
the press called him erratic and unexplainable...
he was just being himself.... ol and dirty and a bastard....
he shall be missed...

newspaper headline: more cia officials consider quitting...
no big surprise...
the cia is an easy scapegoat when it comes to foreign affairs...

and now, director portor goss isn't in a pretty position..
on top of which his top aide, patrick murray, isn't playing nice with the other children..

but that's okay...
one of the candidates considered as a replacement is *ta-da* richard lawless..
a former cia ops officer who is currently deputy assistant secretary of defense for asian and pacific affairs
but that's not the kicker...no...
according to the article in the seattle times, after lawless left the cia he set up a consulting firm that did business in asia...
shortly after, who does he meet, but jeb bush...
yup... good 'ol jeb from florida... who at the time of meeting lawless was florida's secretary of commerce seeking business in asia....

yeah... it all comes back to bullsh... oops.. bush...
one big happy ignorant bred oil lovin american family...

jeebus help america...

u know...
if u say "bush" really fast it sounds like bullshit...coincidence??
i don't think so...

here's to another 4 years of wishing i could deny that george w jackass is the president of the country i call home..

i was at my parents house for a few nights... (few = 2)
stayed the extra night so i could go vote today...
it was a family affair.. the three of us voting along side each other..
it was the first time we ever voted together...
we were also virgins to the chad system...
bizarre little things...

excited to find out who will win...
more exciting than waiting for lotto numbers...

back at my parents home...
it's funny... this used to be "my" home not too long ago..
now, it's ... not.
my old room feels bare.. and a bit foreign..
even the stuff i left behind looks awkwardly out of place...
almost as if they don't belong to me anymore..
as if they were once a part of a life that time has no record of......

underneath all the cooking (a skill which i'm still working on...), cleaning, and running a business..
i'm still here.. surprisingly in one piece...
slowly but surely i'm slipping into the role of "korean wife"...
it's rocky territory, but i'm into a good challenge...

the wedding went off without a hitch...
well, the cake fell over...
but it was hours before the wedding and albertsons was kind enough to redo the two top tiers...

..............it's been about 80 hours since we said "i do.."
and the identity of "wife" still hasn't set in..
but i guess that'll come with time...
at least he doesn't snore or grind his teeth...
i'm also grateful for my in-laws...
they're great down-to-earth people who are respectful but not over-the-top traditional... very understanding individuals...
then again, knowing their son, they've got to be understanding..

tryin to keep my head above water...
no bridesmaids, no best men, no frills..
if i had it my way, it'd be me, him, our parents, and a priest on some far away beach...
but no...
they want to invite people and make tons of food...

*sigh*
sometimes being busy can make u so exhausted, all u can do is cry...
and sometimes being busy just makes u laugh...
in a sanity-questionable-i-belong-in-an-asylum kind of way...

drove to seattle...
thru rain and wind...
picked out rings and watches...
i'm so glad i'm not excessively picky...
but he's more glad...

oh yeah... for those that are wandering in darkness,
i'm gettin hitched...

d-day: october 2, 2004

well... it's 9-eleven... again...
and again we remember horrid images of deeds of misguided men...
at the same time, i'm moved to the realization that inconceivable acts of violence happen everyday, every second somewhere in the world...

may those victims find solace in the fact that their loved ones will always remember them..
and may we also take a moment for those who unwillingly remain unknown..
rest in peace...

one of the things i love best is...
a quiet house...
which can only be done when i'm home alone......

i have learned silence from the talkative,
toleration from the intolerant,
and kindness from the unkind;
yet, strange, I am ungrateful to those teachers.

- kahlil gibran

ok... so i haven't blogged in awhile... i know..
alot has been going on... for those of u who know.. know..
but it hasn't been easy..
let's just say that sometimes... just sometimes..
i hate being so understanding..
this open perspective of empathy...
it's really very... absolutely fucking tiring...

with great power comes great responsibility

i like questionnaires...
they shed light on dark corners..
and give way to more questions..

21 questions

1) grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 18, find line 4:
"what do you suppose he can want now?"
ayn rand - the fountainhead

2) stretch your left arm out as far as you can. what do you touch first?
halogen lamp

3) what is the last thing you watched on TV?
csi:miami

4) without looking, guess what the time is?
2:30am

5) now look at the clock, what is the actual time?
2:45am

6) with the exception of the computer, what can you hear?
music from my headphones

7) when did you last step outside? what were you doing?
midnight ice cream run with my cousin..

8) before you came to this website, what did you look at?
old pictures

9) what are you wearing?
jammies

10) did you dream last night?
i dream every night..

11) when did you last laugh?
earlier, looking at pictures..

12) seen anything weird lately?
depends on what would constitute as weird..
there is always something weird in my house..

13) last movie you saw?
secondhand lions...

14) if you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy first?
pay off my parent's house..

15) tell me something about you that i don't know:
i actually enjoy walking, even though i fuss about it..

16) if you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do?
i'd get rid of money..

17) do you like to dance?
who doesn't? even people without rhythm like to dance..

18) george bush:
jackass.. need i say more?

19) imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her?
a name that shares meaning with the moon..

20) [same question for a boy]
a name that shares meaning with the sun..

21) Would you ever consider living abroad?
hmmm.. i guess so...
i'd have difficulty living somewhere without running water and toilets..

a few days ago a person who i consider my twin soul was in a terrible car accident..
by the looks of her car, they say she shouldn't have survived..
but she did..

for this, i am angry..
for this, i am sad..
for this, i am relieved..
for this, i am grateful..

for this, i love her more..

i know...
there are pictures where i really don't look good at all..
but i keep them anyway..
i try to keep every single picture..
good or bad..
even those with people who i no longer associate with and, in some cases, don't remember their names..
or even those with people i don't like..

i keep them anyway...

bourne again shell (bash)
bourne (sh)
korn (ksh)
c shell (csh)
by the seashore...
welcome to intro to unix...

the first few weeks of an intro class to any geek subject is always a bit tedious... =P

maybe i should get a taxi license (or whatever the correct term)...
and double-tape a meter to the dashboard..
cuz i have been doing way too much driving lately...
they need to develop that star trek transporter thing soon..
either that or i'm gonna start charging people... cha-ching!!

i cannot believe this...
well, actually i can..
but tickets for michael moore's fahrenheit 9/11 are sold out thru monday the 28th..
although that's just at my local theatre,
i'm fairly sure that that is a reflection of other theatres across the nation..

i pulled this from my cousin's xanga site...
looked kinda fun... now i'm not so sure..

layer one: on the outside

name: sally kim
birthdate: 09-25-78
birthplace: Anchorage, AK
current location: Vancouver, WA
eye color: brown
hair color: black
righty or lefty: righty, but i'm not so sure about this question...hmm
zodiac sign: libra.. (chinese zodiac: horse)

layer two: on the inside

your heritage: korean-american (whatever that's supposed to mean lately)
shoes you wore today: sandals
your weakness: myself
your fears: horror movies
your perfect pizza: thai chicken pizza from california pizza kitchen (bellevue)
goal you'd like to achieve: great job, great husband, great kids..

layer three: yesterday, today, tomorrow

your most overused phrase on instant messenger: =P
your thoughts first waking up: where the f*** am i???
your best physical feature: my feet...
your bedtime: whenever wherever however...whatever it takes, i will get my sleep..
your most missed memory: skipping classes with friends and going for drives~

layer four: your pick

pepsi or coke: coke
mcdonald's or burger king: mcdonalds
single or group dates: Both
adidas or nike: adidas
lipton ice tea or nestea: lipton
chocolate or vanilla: chocolate
cappuccino or coffee: coffee

layer five: do you?

smoke: used to..
cuss: hell yes!! but i try to respect those that don't enjoy it as much as me..
single: yeah.. i've got enough stress..
take a shower everyday: why??
have a crush(es): sure, why not.. they're less maintenance than real relationships~
think you've been in love: i like to think so..
liked high school: sure, it wasn't bad.. i actually had a good time..
want to get married: someday.. in a land far far away~
believe in yourself: yeah.. except for that other voice in my head.. i can't trust her..
get motion sickness: whenever i'm not driving..
think you're attractive: hmmm, i'd like to think i'm attractive.. cuz i don't think i'm fugly..
think you're a health freak: hahahaha...that's funny..the krispy kreme donuts in my digestive system are laughing too
get along with your parents: sometimes..
like thunderstorms: yeah.. i like it when nature yells back..(except for when she goes on a destructive rampage.. but then again, humans have been destructive for years)
play an instrument: piano... btw, i'm looking to buy one.. anyone selling?

layer six: in the past month

drank alcohol: well, i gotta do something now that i'm not doing drugs or smoking
done a drug: i've been pretty clean for 4 years.. yay~
gone on a date: sure
gone to the mall: a few times..
been on stage: oh dear god, no..
eaten an entire box of oreos: ewwww..
eaten sushi: no.. i miss it..
been dumped: in the past month? nope..
gone skating: nope.. i'm contemplating whether or not i really want bruises on my ass
gone skinny dipping: never...
dyed your hair: no, but i've recently received complaints that my hair is too black..
stolen anything: no..

layer seven: ever

played a game that required removal of clothing: no.. i tend to stay away from those kinds of situations..
been trashed or extremely intoxicated: yuppers..
been caught "doing something": doing wut? gotta be more specific~
been called a tease: i don't think i am, but some may beg to differ..
gotten beaten up: no.. and if i ever do, the other person is gonna look a helluva lot worse.. trust me
shoplifted: no.. too much guilt..
changed who you were to fit in: if anything, i tried not to fit in..

layer eight: getting older

age you hope to be married: hopefully before 30, but who knows and who cares.. if it happens, it happens.. if it don't, well, u get the idea
numbers of children: 2, one of my own and one adopted..
describe your dream wedding: a place with my man, our family, and our friends..
how do you want to die: in my sleep..
what do you want to be when you grow up: me.. no substitutions or preservatives
what country would you most like to visit: antarctica

layer nine: in a gal/guy

best eye color: hazel, green, or brown
best hair color: anything dark..
short or long hair: short
height: taller than me, but not too tall..
best first date location: anywhere together??
articles of clothing: as long as they're wearing clothes..

layer ten: in the numbers

number of people i could trust with my life: that's a powerful question.. perhaps i'm too trusting or i'm lucky but after much thought the number comes in at 8 or 9..
number of cd's i own: i haven't counted in a long time.. but i believe my last count was somewhere over 200 give or take 50..
number of piercings: two closed.. cuz i stopped wearing earrings when i was about 10..
number of tattoos: none, but i did think about it for a minute
number of times my name has appeared in the Newspaper?: once that i recall, but my memory is shady..
number of scars on my body: like i have time to count.. i don't even know where half of them come from
number of things in my past that I regret: zero, zilch, nada

boxes

i like boxes
there's something about boxes
from reinforced layers of steel to cardboard shoeboxes

boxes are good for moving shtuff around
they're good for holding secrets
if u don't know what to give someone, give 'em a box
u just can't go wrong with a box

they're very useful...
dead people are stored in boxes
the evil stepmother wanted snow white's heart in a box
we live in boxes, albeit some are more elaborate than others..
nonetheless a box..
pandora had a box..

big boxes, small boxes, skinny and fat boxes
they can appear quite sturdy on the exterior
but u just don't know what u'll find on the inside
but that's the chance that we have to take

i've come across a variety of boxes thus far
some i've kept
some i've lost
some great and some not so hot
but i refuse to regret any one of them

what kind of box are u?

ever since high school i've been shlepping people around..
among my friends, i was one of the first to have a car..
and they put it to good use..

drove my aunt and cousin up to seattle yesterday..
and i have to escort them back down..

i am sparta...ah screw it..
i am underpaid, overworked daughter of yellow parents..

on the bright side...100 posts.. (yay!)

went to jimmy mak's last night with some friends..
saw and listened to the amazing karrin allyson..
saturday, june 12 is her last night at jm's...
it's 20 bucks, but she's well worth it..

jimmy mak's came highly recommended..
the food was delish.. the musak sublime..
and the service.. it didn't even feel like service..
it felt more like i knew the guy that ran the place..
really comfortable atmostphere..

we had a great time..
and i'd definitely frequent the establishment again..

without music life would be a mistake -friedrich wilhelm nietzsche-

lately i've been having these really peculiar dreams..
i'm in some social setting.. church, school, etc..
everything's completely normal..
no disfigured faces, no cars driving off bridges..

all of a sudden i lose consciousness and fall to the floor..
this has never happened to me in the entire 25 years of my existence..
it's kind of a frightening thought..
even when got so piss drunk on my birthday that i couldn't walk or open my eyes,
i was very aware of my environment and remember everything that happened that evening up until the point i was comfortably in my bed and blissfully asleep..

so this kind of vision is almost like a nightmare for me..
the possibility that i could unwillingly lose control of myself is unsettling..
it's only a dream, i know..

i just watched bowling for columbine recently..
it's ironic.. i just wrote a paper for one of my classes..

my objective:

saying that I'm asian american doesn't quite cut it for me anymore. i intend to explore (re-search) what being asian american means to me and how it has shaped the person i am today. i believe this sort of analysis is imperative to shed light on who i am and who i want to be.

what i actually ended up doing was re-evaluating my split personality..
namely, korean me and american me..
and i sort of got disappointed in american me..

Charles Clark cites two different points of view in his article "The New Immigrants." The first is from journalist Georgie Anne Geyer who "blasts immigrants and government policies that encourage immigrants to view citizenship as an opportunity for economic benefits rather than civic responsibility." She continues to criticize by warning how this "will destroy America as we have known it and substitute a very different country, one that is spiritually incoherent, humanly conflict-ridden and economically hobbled." On the other hand John Fonte defends multiculturalism with, "Our goal should be Americanization, stated clearly without apology and without embarrassment.... Americanization does not mean giving up our ethnic traditions, customs, cuisine or birth languages. It means patriotic assimilation."

whatever our goal, it seems that we need to redefine america or perhaps we never defined america in the first place... it just sort of came to be...

"Give me your tired, your poor, Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free, The wretched refuse of your teeming shore; Send these, the homeless, tempest-tost to me, I lift my lamp beside the golden door"

we have permitted politics, capitalism, and, as michael moore demonstrated, fear to cloud our judgment of what we dream of america to be.
this is neither my american nor is it any one person's america; this is our ancestors', ours and the multitudes' that will come after us..

bowling for columbine strongly confirmed what i've been thinking for the past few months, but couldn't quite formulate into one train of thought..
that there's something seriously wrong with the direction of the country i call home..
there's bush, there's the war, there's the sorry state of this nation, and then there's me..
me who has never made a conscious effort to find out what the hell is going on..
well, no more..

like tons of other americans, i don't watch the news anymore..
it's sickening.. really..
i don't let my mother watch either..
she's like a magnet.. all she picks up on is words like kill, murdered, robbed, raped.. and they're like a switch that immediately turns on her fear neuron..
i can barely summon the will to type that last violation.. it's nauseating..

don't those newscasters get disgusted with themselves when they allow those words to pass through their mouths? rape, sexually violated...
and then that's just the leading story..
most of the rest of the stories are about what can kill u and if it hasn't yet, it will, u just wait..
all i can stand to watch is the weather.. and even then i usually go to weather.com

i was between 3 and 10 when reagan sat in the oval office...
so i won't presume to know him or speculate what kind of person he was..
let's just say he had some good speechwriters..
here are some words we won't be hearing from bush...

"I take full responsibility for my own actions and for those of my administration. As angry as I may be about activities undertaken without my knowledge, I am still accountable for those activities. As disappointed as I may be in some who served me, I'm still the one who must answer to the American people for this behavior. And as personally distasteful as I find secret bank accounts and diverted funds, well, as the Navy would say, this happened on my watch."
-- Remarks given by Reagan regarding the Iran-Contra scandal given in an address to the nation following receipt of the Tower Commission's investigation report in the Oval Office, March 4, 1987

in addition, my grandfather is also ailing from the same illness as ron...
parkinsons... and nancy's a big advocate for research..
behind every seemingly great man, there is an even greater woman..
may he rest in peace and
may she find solace...

i know i'm still young..
but it's not like i'm getting younger as the days pass..
(although, people still tell me i look 18 or younger..
so, it's not so bad)

i feel it the worst when kids i knew when they were in diapers
are now graduating from college..
i can't help but question myself, "wut the f*** r u doing, girl??"
but i remind myself that i'm on a different path..
what they do is their thing..
and what i do is mine...
so, it's all good...
(that thought process doesn't happen that fast, by the way..)

sunday... sunday's are weird..
they're kind of unpredictable..
let me just say this, .. people are fascinatingly wacky..

so, for people that actually read this..
i put up some new songs on the other site...
the first one, i heard it on csi:miami's season finale..
the second one, i've harbored for awhile.. go to his website to learn more..
i strongly recommend getting his entire album..
he's one of few musicians who are really passionate about the music..
there's videos of him at vh-1 too..
oh, and he's cute too.. hehe..

man... i'm gonna do my rain dance..
cuz this weather desperately needs to cool down..
my poor tower can't take this abuse..

on another note, i'm done with those papers..
yesss!!!!
i am so so so glad i'm not an english major..
cuz, u know, it's not fer me~

still working on these term papers...
meanwhile, listen and laugh at foamy bitch..

finals is fast approaching...
actually, it's more like i'm being dragged to my appointment with the guillotine... just follow the heel tracks..
(doesn't that paint a pretty picture?? oh the visuals in my little head..)

one last chance at experiencing the free world..
i'm going to the zoo tomorrow for a few hours..
if it rains, screw it.. i'm still going...
besides, what are umbrellas for???

arrrggghhh.. i hate it when i wake up minutes before my alarm clock..
to rob myself of those last precious minutes of sleep is preposterous..
grrrr..

some days i just want to forget that the world exists
and curl up into a tiny little ball..

stress makes my tummy hurt..
i'm surprised i don't have an ulcer..
breathe in...
breathe out...

ever since moving to oregon/vancouver i never made an effort to make friends..
i thought, i've already got the greatest friends, why would i need more?
but more came..

yesterday, a dear friend graduated from pnca
twas a lovely affair... a full house, inspiring speakers, and free food~
once again, i played the role of supportive friend..
taking pictures, holding flowers, guarding bags, and taking more pictures..
but hey, i'll do just about anything for free food..
except for sleep with someone..

and i digress..
the 2004 senior thesis exhibition is currently on display downtown at the cornelia & william t.c. stevens studios (if u get to main building, ask for the thesis annex)...
the exhibition is open tues - sat 11am-6pm through sat june 19th...
there's some really great art...
(pssst... look for esther lee's~)

i really should stop trying to help people,
when i'm a whole basketcase myself..
it's ridiculous..

three of my girlfriends from seattle came to visit yesterday..
it would be the first time in at least 3 years since i last saw them..
we had the best time ever..

had dim sum in chinatown, coffee in portland, shopping at woodburn..
it rained a little, but nothing was going to faze us..
laughing, taking pictures, and telling stories..
"great", "awesome", "wonderful"... they don't do this experience justice..
no word ever will..

from the moment we hugged hello, to the moment we hugged goodbye,
it was as if we didn't miss a beat..
i'm so grateful that i've been blessed with such friends..

"what is a friend? a single soul dwelling in two bodies."
-aristotle-

"without friends no one would choose to live, though he had all other goods"
-aristotle-

went and saw van helsing..
u know.. hugh jackman.. kate beckinsale..
it wasn't what i expected..
they turned vampires into dispassionate monsters..
but they did well in the special effects department..
all in all, i'd say this is one to rent..

i called someone of the male persuasion a jackass today..
and boy did it feel gooOOod..

driving along, singing a happy tune..
when mr jackass cuts me off..
but that wasn't wut pissed me off..no no no...
about 10 feet later, he decides he needs to come to a near stop and turn right..

so, i rolled down my passenger window..
and with the grace of one inflicted by tourette's, with every fiber in my being, i yelled, "jackass!!!!"
mr jackass did a double take..
and i went back to my happy song..

damn, that felt good..

things are pretty constant these days..
constantly busy, that is..
just keep swimming, just keep swimming..

television season finales are wrapping up..
angel is finished..
nothing more to watch than simpsons..
everything else is lame..

keeping my eye on a digital camera, but it costs almost $400..
anyone wanna make a donation?

found a new addiction... beads..
so many colors, so little time..

and bush is still the idiot son of an a**hole..
no big surprise there...

as everyone well knows,
there's been that tragedy with the train accident and explosion in north corea..
so far more than 160 dead and more than 1300 injured,
but that's only what they report..
they won't let anyone in to see the wreckage...

on top of that, they don't want relief coming by land..
they'd rather it come by sea...
some choice words that come to mind are: arrogant, asinine & suicidal..
(which reminds me of another "idiot son of an asshole", but that's for a different day..)

yes~, while my comrade is bleeding to death,
i can wait 2 days for his medical supplies rather than 4 hours...

why stress myself...
i don't need stress..
so, i've decided.. i'm going to audit that lame 8am linear algebra course..
i'd rather put more emphasis on this 10 page research essay..
and have fun learning about the gin craze and industrial revolution from dr fisher..

whew~ that's a load off my shoulders...

i finally fixed my uncle's computer..
fixed is an understatement.. i built him a brand-spankin new one..

rules of purchasing a computer:

#1. never ever purchase compaq
unless u get turned on by horrible customer service..
in which case, u are very sick and need help...
or unless u honestly didn't know any better..

sidenote: i don't know where they got it or why,
but their towers are a mod's nightmare.. *shudder*

more rules to come...

i never study for the first exam of the season...
my theory is that i'll be so upset about how bad i did
that it'll drive my inner obsessive compulsive bitch to do uber-well the rest of the term....
cuz god knows the carrot-on-a-stick tactic doesn't do shit..

if you haven't noticed..
not that i really believe anybody's reading this..
but i've been writing more often..
...
that is, more often than once a week
i guess i'm trying to be more productive..
i know i say i'm busy all the time, and i am..
but that doesn't mean i'm actually producing something of value..
there's one more notion to ponder... productivity vs busy-work
(and i just realized that that's been around for awhile..
we all know i'm a bit slow.. it's these damn short legs..)

meanwhile, this 8am class is kicking my ass
yes.. u read right... 8am...
it's enough that it's in the ante meridiem...
it's so early that it's at that point in my sleep cycle where i can hear & feel nothing,
including, but not limited to, my alarm clock, a rooster, and an earthquake..
i am so screwed

the thing i dislike about spring the most is daylight savings
it's awful..
some people may think that sleep is wasteful..
but sleep is the most peaceful and beautiful thing between today and tomorrow..

sometimes i think i was a vampire in my last lifetime

it's april already... start of a new month and spring is here..
back in february i sketched out a career plan..
i know, it's very unlike me to do this..
but i thought it'd be fun and actually it's surprising..

i made a few short term and long term goals..
so far, 4 out of the 6 goals are either in progress or complete..
... i'm feelin pretty damn good...

somewhere over the rainbow way up high
and the dreams that you dreamed of
once in a lullaby~
somewhere over the rainbow blue birds fly
and the dreams that you dreamed of
dreams really do come true

someday I'll wish upon a star
wake up where the clouds are far behind me
where trouble melts like lemon drops
high above the chimney tops thats where you'll find me

clementine: joel, i'm not a concept. too many guys think i'm a concept or i complete them or i'm going to make them alive, but i'm just a fucked up girl who is looking for my own peace of mind. don't assign me yours.

- eternal sunshine of the spotless mind

"how happy is the blameless vestal's lot!
the world forgetting, by the world forgot.
eternal sunshine of the spotless mind!
each pray'r accepted, and each wish resign'd;"

- excerpt from eloisa to abelard by alexander pope

a wonderful movie...
for the first time in a long time, whether we admit it or not, the relationships portrayed in this movie were real...
they weren't the glamorous, park avenue, rodeo drive, i-only-wear-versace sparkling successful people..
they were dirty and awkward... they were human...
thank you mr kaufman...

and the more i try to remember everything about the movie,
the more it triggers memories, ideas, and feelings about myself and my life...

go and watch it, if u haven't...
and if you haven't read the synopsis... don't.... just watch it...

"blessed are the forgetful: for they get the better even of their blunders..."

- beyond good and evil by friedrich wilhelm nietzsche

first it rained for 2 weeks straight...
then the butt rockets are out and about
and we just can't get enough of this sun
that blocks my view of the neighbor kids playing in my circle
which gives me an excuse to run them over with my car... =P

it's march already, papers & exams galore,
with a plethora of finals next week,
add to that, taxes are due..

dude, spring is just not my season...

99% of the people in my life are computer illiterate..
so i am their makeshift tech support..
at first i thot this was due to the fact that i don't charge them..

at the same time, i was glad cuz i believed they acknowledged and accepted my choice
to take a path other than med school..
and i try to be as friendly and open as possible...
explaining things in non-computer terms...and all sorts of ridiculous analogies, including cooking..

not to say that i talk down to them,
(cuz i realize i am no computer expert...
i'm more of a bridge connecting them to more experienced nerds who speak in binary code..)
i understand that they can be seen as complicated pieces of machinary..

but often times my frustration stems from people who won't even try to understand the answer...
after i'm done with my well-thought-out explanations (sometimes they're not even that patient..),
they repeat the question.... this time with fervor...
in the end i feel as if i relived the same 5 minutes over and over again...
therefore, they're not even questions...
they're actually complaints with question marks...

the more irritating folks give way to a strong desire to yell,
"yeah? well, maybe it's not ur box, maybe it was ur pea brain that let in that virus.... u don't open credit card solicitations from the mailbox, but yet u just can't resist the urge to double-click on that e-mail with the subject line: bulk cheap viagra!!..."
then i want to rescue their towers from their abusive environments.. not to mention poor ventilation..

after some breathing exercises, i try to think of alternate theories...
maybe they aren't calling me becuz they really want to know the answer to their "questions"..
but rather, they just want someone who will hear their complaints..
and for once, they will get a response other than, "i don't know"..

in addition to my own theory...
i only ask that they consider the possibility that it really isn't their tower...
or the program, or the internet, or the idea "i was just minding my own business when it just froze up on me.."
maybe it's them... their lack of consideration to maintain their overpriced towers...
it's like ignoring the red oil can beaming brightly underneath their speedometer..
by jeebus, they pay an arm and a leg, god forbid they defrag once in awhile...

my hope? that one day i'll browse cnn and there will be an article:
family computer bursts into flames from lack of maintenance...

stumbled across the mesmerizing garrison keillor...
reading about the birth of his legendary lake wobegon..
i enjoyed the multimedia slideshow the best..

"don't sleep in our bar,
we don't drink in ur bed"

quoted by a friend of a friend...

"sometimes i wish i had a dick,
then my brain wouldn't hurt so much"

-unknown-

so, i went to a play last night...
i had always heard of it, but never really knew what it was about..
the title threw me off a bit..
it made me think of some alternative-retro-goth-thing..
and growing up, i was always surrounded by the pop or hiphop crowd...
so this was quite new...

i tried to go with an open mind..
there were paintings of roses.. pictures of half naked women..
and booths promoting planned parenthood and pro-choice...
there were black t-shirts with pink lettering: i heart my cunt..

interestingly, i came away with a sense of enlightenment..
for u see, their message was nothing new..
but unfortunately, it still must be proclaimed...

it's very simple, really..
stop violating women.
happy v-day. (for those of u who know, know the v)

the dell keyboard sucks ass...
it's just plain r.e.t.a.r.d.e.d....

although the weekend isn't over yet, i'm feeling rather smug..
you see, this weekend i've actually been somewhat productive with my time...
worry not, several moments were spent on time-wasting activities..
but i also completed several tasks on my to-do list...
aren't you proud of moi?

well, i think i found me..
she went and possessed a friend of mine..
and now my friend is in this 'blah' mood and she's cussing like a sailor..
(it doesn't help when she's got more catholic guilt than the pope)

how does one procure an exorcist...
i want me back, damnit...

i've got a statistics exam today..
the class is fairly easy and the instructor is actually one of those rare finds..
he likes to teach and he does it well..
but for some reason i'm not into doing well...
it's like part of me is wandering somewhere...
i don't mind going off like that...
but i wish she'd tell me where she's going..
or at the very least when she's coming back...

... .... ..... waiting for myself...

update: considering i wasn't entirely myself that day,
i didn't do so bad for a person who barely studied...
oh well, better than nothing

"shake things up...
shake up the world..."

- muhammad ali

happy new year...
it's the year of the monkey...

get out and get ur very own chimpinocchio..

hey!!!!
courtesy of ernie..
i read this...

this is based only on the article and ms. sweeney's e-mail...
people like sweeney are what i generally refer to as "head-up-ass"...
they only feign to know the material, but they haven't a clue how to teach..

it's like being a parent..
almost any male and female combo can produce a child..
(sounds like a fast food combo...haha.. oops, sidetracked)
but that doesn't make either of them a 'mom' or a 'dad'..

just cuz sweeney knows the material doesn't make her a teacher..
yes, kids today can be annoying little buggers, but they're kids...
(and this is coming from a person who isn't fond of children...
i find they're not so bad if i can just get past their incessant "i'm bored" chants)
i can only hope that young carl himself doesn't grow to be as uptight as sweeney...

(sidenote: i wasn't surprised when the point of origin was texas...
i've heard anal retentiveness is quite common there)

(disclaimer: if you're from texas and not a dumb-ass,
u're probably not white or not southern baptist or u're gay, take ur pick)

this little piggy

alright alright
2004 is here...i get it
it's strange.. it doesn't feel like a "new" year..
december 31st rolled over to january 1st,
and we still have the same shit from 2003 to clean up...
but i did something different this year..
i actually made some resolutions...
umm... i'd post them, if i could find them..
lemme get back to u on that... i swear, it's here somewhere..

ah ha! found it.
first, a correction is in order... it's resolution.
one resolution.
cut back on the procrastination..
u laugh... but i've gotten better over the years...
others are fat or addicted to crack..
i procrastinate